Saturday, November 12, 2005

Nonattachment and me

I was half asleep in the car this afternoon--don't worry, DW was driving--when I began to cogitate on the principle of nonattachment and its application inside my own mind. I've been able to detach myself from various "shoulds" over the past few years--my stubbornness on my boys' placement outside the home being the hardest--but I've not yet been able to detach myself from the concept of categorizing myself and my bad habit of self-loathing, something that is fairly complicated and deeply ingrained. Is this a function of my having more of an ego than I'm willing to admit? Is it cultural? Habitual? Delusional? I'd like to think I'm perfectly happy being whomever and whatever I may be at any given moment in my impermanent, transient existence, but I'm not there yet.

3 comments:

Phoebe said...

It would be great to have the supreme self-confidence of the 4-year-old in his last few months of preschool (I got this from McSweeney's site):

"9:04 a.m. Forward hilarious e-mail to everyone in address book. Subject line: "Poo-poo."

9:10 a.m. Take spreadsheets out of Star Wars backpack. Stretch out on floor and begin making notations with crayon."

Take a psychological break and regress to pleasanter times:

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/

(scroll down to "The Four-Year-Old's Worday")

Randy said...

Oh, that would be the poo poo e-mail I forwarded yesterday. Thanks for the link!

Ann said...

When you get to being
whomever and whatever I may be at any given moment in my impermanent, transient existence
Please post directions for me, OK? I'd like to find that place, too.