Sunday, March 29, 2009

Boilerplate Husband

DW saw a number on her caller ID this morning that she thinks is the local LDS bishop's cell number. The LDS Church has policy requiring the permission of a husband for his wife to accept any significant church assignment. IIRC, this is set out in the Church Handbook of Instructions, but it's been a while since I had a copy of that publication, so I could be wrong. Anyhow, I drafted this to take care of any possible consent issues in advance:

I, R, do not accept the premise that my consent or permission is necessary for my spouse, C, to accept any calling or assignment, or to do any action that is not illegal or, though perhaps technically legal, is an action that would shock the conscience of a reasonable citizen of those states of the United States whose public policies are in agreement with my own policy preferences. In the event of any action that is illegal or that would shock the conscience of a reasonable citizen of those states of the United States chosen by me, I disclaim in advance any knowledge of, or consent to, any such action, unless such action would further my own personal interests.

However, in accordance with the policies of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I hereby declare that I agree to C holding any calling in the Slidell Ward of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints that she chooses to accept. Should C does not wish to accept a calling but does not wish to declare this wish, then I do not agree to her accepting any such calling. I hereby consent to C invoking this species of non-agreement at her discretion.

I declare under penalty of perjury under the laws of the United States of America that the foregoing is true and correct. Executed on 29 March 2009

She laughed, then folded it up and put it in her purse. Of course she won't use this document, but maybe she'll show it to some of the women of the ward who possess a sense of humor.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Res Ipsa Loquitur

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c
IndigNation! Populist Uprising '09 - The Enragening
Daily Show Full EpisodesImportant Things w/ Demetri MartinPolitical Humor

Leave it to Fox to have a reporter so naive as to not realize he is suggesting that conservatives want to perform a particular sex act on the White House.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Basic Cable Brouhaha

Jon Stewart's war with CNBC should reach its apex tonight when Jim Cramer appears on The Daily Show.

Monday, March 09, 2009

"Fire!" Wait, didn't I just say that?

Ugh! I guess it's not so bad that I've only planned my upcoming fence project and haven't actually started construction yet. Also, I used the garden hose to build a little lake in the woods behind our house, so we're protected in case this fire gets close enough to be a problem for us.

Airplanes plan to fly over forest fires in St. Tammany today
by The Times-Picayune
Monday March 09, 2009, 8:11 AM

Airplanes will fly over forest fires that have been burning in Slidell and Mandeville as soon as the fog lifts today to make sure the fires remain contained, said state Department of Agriculture and Forestry District Manager Kirk Casanova.

Firefighters worked through the night to bring the fires under control, Casanova said. So far, they have burned about 1,200 acres of timberland in Slidell and about 400 acres in Mandeville, he said. No homes have been affected by the fires, he said.

The first fire broke out near the Slidell Airport and the Bellaire subdivision. Firefighters started fighting that blaze Saturday around 11 a.m. and stayed until about midnight, when it appeared to be under control, according to department spokesman Sam Irwin.

They left the Slidell site to focus on the Mandeville fire, north of Fontainbleau State Park off U.S. 190 and west of Louisiana 1088, Irwin said.

But the winds blew hard and the fire near Slidell jumped the fire-break and continued to spread before it was again contained, he said.

Casanova no arrests have been made in the fires, but the investigation is continuing.