If you meet a fencing master on the road,
You may give him your sword,
If you meet a poet,
You may offer him your poem.
When you meet others,
Say only a part of what you intend.
Never give the whole thing at once.
- Mu-mon 1228
I just thought this would be ironic to post on a personal blog.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
The Daily Zen
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6 comments:
I've blogged before about the balancing act on a personal blog. On the one hand, you want to be authentic and interesting. On the other hand, there is the matter of Other People and their privacy, and the need to keep some pieces of ourselves to ourselves.
I was struck when re-reading my blog from when I was so depressed that there really isn't much evidence of that. For weeks, there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't wish I was dead, and yet that protective shell? Shame? that says "not for public consumption..." overrode any need I might have felt to write about what was happening to me. I guess that's where a "real" journal would be a better writing tool, if the goal is to get authentic experiences on the page. I'm always battling my inner censor.
Good poem.
Yes, there is a self-censorship element in blogging. I very recently went through my own recent posts and deleted any that, say, a psychotic relative might try to twist and use against me with other family members. Heck, just the fact that I saw Brokeback Mountain would be cause for suspicion with them. None of that kooky bunch has discovered this blog, as far as I know, but I'll admit to being a teency bit paranoid.
I was pondering the same quote myself yesterday. Speaking of self-censorship, I do it - all the time. Ann, I remember the same thing from my own bouts with depression. Even "real" journals contain self-censorship, I think. Unfortunately. I don't have anyone I know in "real" life reading my blog. How about you guys?
I know five of the regular readers of my blog in real life.
I know some of my real-life readers, too. Randy, Mom, DH, Lynda, and Debbie come to mind.
A LOT of Real Life people stopped by my blog during Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath.
Incidentally, I don't know anybody at the Iranian Foreign Ministry. Really, I don't.
I suppose I try to avoid discussing my deepest feelings, emotions, and, yes, secrets. There may be appropriate venues for those discussions, but I don't think the open Internet is the place. On the other hand, Internet discussions with other people have helped me open up to people in real life. I'm really a closed, shy, timid soul by nature--nothing like some of my Internet alter-egos, who can be amazingly brash and obnoxious.
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