Saturday, December 11, 2004

I've been thinking recently about why I have had so many odd dreams in the past couple of years. I've posted a few of them here, and there are quite a few more. I didn't dream very much at all until recently, then it was like the steel door behind which my subconscious self was locked burst open. Many of the dreams I have had are about dealing with the subconscious, though the dreams presented themselves in a symbolic form. Many of the issues that are coming up go way back to my childhood; it's intersting how feelings one has about oneself as an adult are based on childhood experiences. For example, I have strong feelings of inferiority to many other people IRL, despite understanding logically that I'm no worse or better than they are. I wonder how many people have subconscious issues pop up around age 40? How can they/we alter patterns of thought and behavior that have become entrenched over a lifetime?

3 comments:

Phoebe said...

Add me to your list of suddenly self-aware 40-year-olds. I don't know why what we were conditioned to learn as children still sticks today. It's like I have to go through another teenagerhood so I can grow up again. The older I get, though, the more I realize that people I idealize usually have their own boatload of problems; they're just better at hiding it.
My dreams aren't as vivid as they used to be. I wonder what that means.

none said...

Like I wrote in my other comment a few posts back, I don´t think that it has to do with age...but I´ll agree, it seems that 40 is the time most people begin to develop depth, and beging to wonder if there is something more out there, except the, sometimes grinding, routine of making a living and raising kids.

Can a person change thoughts and patterns of a lifetime? I think they can. I know people who did, which gives me great deal of hope that I might be able to do the same.

But the whole thing often fails on the fact that most people would rather die than face them selves.

Phoebe said...

I read somebody's philosophy somewhere that when we were children, we were our most "authentic" selves, and therefore the happiest. It sounds right, but then how could we pin our problems to our childhood past if we were supposed to be so damned happy as children?