Yesterday Phoebe got me a'thinkin' 'bout anger and the difficulty I have with that emotion. I'm very self-critical and aware of my inadequacies, failures, and inner demons, so I have quite a bit of anger turned inwards. I've been told that depression is anger turned inwards. However, I have real trouble allowing myself to be angry at other people or about events around me. Is that a Randy thing? A guy thing? A Mormon thing? A Mormon guy thing?
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
I think it is a good thing.
I have been thinking about this quite a bit today.
I think it is not at all unusual for folks who seriously meditate to take a much more positive view of their fellow humans than the rest of us tortured souls who wrestle with existence, trying to beat it into submission. Instead, you just move through and experience it.
I also think you have a quite pragmatic/practical approach to life, in that you see shaking your fist at the uncaring heavens as just silly.
That said, I think you are capable of anger, and actually do get quite angry, but it squirts out the sides at things rather than being directed (or misdirected) at people. You have said that you get really, really, angry at your lawn mower, for example.
Perhaps your depressive tendencies are indeed anger directed inward, because the objects of your real anger are...unacceptable objects of your anger. Because, of course, it's not their fault. The existence of that anger Can Not Be, because that would make you a Bad Person. So it doesn't exist.
Armchair psychological bullshit from a depressive high school graduate. Worth what you paid for it.
Wow, Ann.
Actually, my therapist told me the same thing -- depression is anger turned inward. This was a habit I got into as a TBM Mormon. Anger was deemed a bad emotion, so I tried not to show it, therefore I turned it inwards. It's very draining.
"I'm very self-critical and aware of my inadequacies, failures, and inner demons, so I have quite a bit of anger turned inwards. ... However, I have real trouble allowing myself to be angry at other people or about events around me."
Wow, that is me oft times!
I really like what you said Ann.
"Is that a Randy thing? A guy thing? A Mormon thing? A Mormon guy thing?"
Randy, IMHO it is just a "human thing" and our experience might paint a picture of the "why" but it isn't very useful in the end.
Oh wait a minute, here's a thought - perhaps it is useful to the extent that we focus on overcoming the "thing" by focusing on the “why” for a time, this then serves as a distraction and the distraction gives us a break from reality. Just as we need to sleep - which gives us a break from reality (nature’s gift) looking at the “why” is like sleeping, it can be good if we don’t over-sleep, we don't want reality always in our face. Perhaps dwelling on something that ultimately doesn't serve us does in fact serve us in a back-handed way.
Do you think I can get anymore convoluted than that? *smile* (that was over the top even for me)
Just to clarify, I think it is a good thing to not be angery with those around us. As for being self critical, I was really that way till I shed the myth of Mo-ism, and I still do to some extent but has diminished in may ways. I have been known to get angry at others, but I find renting space out to them is not very porductive.
Post a Comment